rushing

(read with music in the bacground-click on title)

.

.

.

blood rushed though her veins bubbling

like boiling water over the side of the kettle

her biggest fear was nearing the surface

and came out of his mouth

and there was silence

her heart stopped for a moment

there was no movement

no time no place

only nothingness

her life ended for a moment

and then there was movement

arms wrapping themselves around her

her head digging its place

tears rolling

and there was noise

like that of a baby taking her first breath

it came out of her mouth

her biggest fear was covering the floor

like water out of an upset kettle

blood rushed through her veins

and she was ready to fight for a new life...

.

.

.

all summed up when looking at: http://dianevarner.com/index.php?showimage=193

mondays that seem...

mondays that seem longer and darker crept into the city

and she spent the day in his white cappatoio watching

the magnificant Audrey Hepburn falling in love with complete

strangers over the fragment of a minute...

..that too is a choice...

but how is it that on the screen there is hardly ever a shade of doubt

noone ever thinks back or hesitates

she felt sure in the fluffy whitness covering her but loneliness

crept up and memories moved accross her mind like dark shadows

on the shiny snow as she filled the vibrating screen with messages of love

accumulated over the years.

She realized that the 7months of silence was really only about one month long,

and was her silence, her unwillingness to talk to, to listen to

but his messages crept through the walls of her heart

and made her extremely angry

with herself.

how do you ever get over betraying your heart?

how do you ever forgive moments you never should have enjoyed?

how can you ever be sure what is it that your heart tells?

how do you know those moments were not simply your last desperate

attempt to break free from a love that will change the rest of your life?

she looked up. he was not there. she hugged the bathrobe and thought

about how sthuuuupid it was to ask all these questions

instead of simply moving onto enjoying the life that chose her.